Question of the week - Nov 10 - Nov 17

[cindyg2005]

I wait to see how things are handled. If they can not handle it on their own, I step in. If they are hitting, etc. to each other. I make them sit on the floor looking at each other for 5 minutes and they are not allowed to laugh or they have to stay there longer. It seems it only take about 2 minutes and someone is laughing. They forget what they were fighting about.

Cindyg2005

[LarryTheCucumber]

I let them work it out if it's minor. If it turns into a big screaming fight, TV time or other things get taken away for a while depending on what was happening.

[mslady]

Hi, I believe that if the arguement isn't too severe the children should be allowed to work it out themselves. But, if it gets too bad an adult should step in. They should get each story and separate the children until they calm down. And if it still continues keep separating them. Soon or later they are going to miss each others company and forgive and forget.

Kells

[cksmom]

I let them work it out if it's verbal and if it goes on too long then they are warned that whatever they are fighting over will be taken away. If they end up pushing each other then I step in and they have consequences, my 4 year old gets a time out and my 8 year old writes sentences.

[mary84123]

it depends on what age they are. while younger, they need us to step in, if only to show them proper words and actions. later, depending on the problem, they should be able to work it out themselves.

[sizz_l]

I have two daughters age 5 and 1. With such an age difference, the challenge is to teach the younger one what not to do while showing the older one that she is learning. Luckily, my older daughter has the patience of a saint(not from me - LOL), confrontations so far are few and far between! If it is physical, I redirect them to other activities. If it is communication, I help them bridge the gap. If I'm tired, I'm not so patient........

[lfurches]

Depends! Most often let them resolve on own. I have twin boys who are two and 1/2. I try and direct most of the fighting right now to guide them in appropriate behavior. No Hitting, biting, screaming, etc. Sometimes they work it out, disolving into a pile laughing before I say anything or step in. As they get older, I will give them more and more freedom to resolve it on their own. Unless it is biting or hitting, I usually just verbally guide. Be nice to your brother, share, say I am sorry, or please, etc.

[sadiellen]

I step in and try to think of something one can explain or "teach" the other so it gets their minds and not their mouths and fist going.

[tinkerbell5676]

I am a foster mom so it really depends on the ages of the kids involved and their unique backgrounds as to how I would react. IF it sounds like they are not going to resolve the issue on their own then I step in before the first physical confrontation. By listening out of sight I can usually tell whether or not any of the lessons I have been trying to teach them has started to sink in. I was a hot head kid so I am aware how fast things can turn physical. I generally take away anything that is beening argued over, put the kids involved in time out, if a sincere is not given later, then we work together until I hear friendly exchanges betweeen those that had been fighting. There is no avoiding each other. In day to day living such as the workplace or school there is no avoiding the other person so if the kids have a project they have to work together on such as making a bed, a salad, they have to talk to each other, etc. It has worked out well for me and them.

[tlannan30]

It depends on where we are. At home I try to let them work it out. But in the car if the bickering is distracting me from driving then I try to distract them with a game of some sort. When we are somewhere in public I just don't put up with it.