Every parent wants to protect their child from emotional harm, but this isn’t always possible. If your family is going through a difficult period or has just received bad news, it can be difficult to know how to support a child. Although every child is different, here are a few tips to help you navigate these trying times.
#1 Keep them occupied
First and foremost, give a child something to occupy themselves with and preserve their routine. Times of turmoil are often extremely busy but make sure to spend as much time with your child as possible. Loneliness will compound any worries that they already have, but keeping them occupied with games and fun activities will go some way to diverting their attention elsewhere. This doesn’t mean simply sitting them in front of a television or video game, though. Children look to you for comfort and need to be accompanied during difficult periods. Spend as much time as possible interacting with them and choose games that involve both parent and child.
#2 Be honest
It’s tempting to try and shield children from the harsh truths of the world, but this isn’t always the best course of action. If, for example, a parent is in a hospital or a hospice in San Diego, then the chances are the child already knows that something is amiss. In these situations, it’s better to be gentle but upfront. Sit the child down and explain the situation to them in simple but honest terms. Kids are more grown-up than most parents give them credit for, and trying to keep them in the dark about difficult issues will only leave them feeling alienated. Explain what’s happening, why, and how, if possible, it might be resolved.
#3 Answer questions
This follows naturally from the previous point. It’s likely that children will have lots of questions, some of which you won’t be able to answer. Be as honest as possible with your responses and, where applicable, admit that you simply don’t know. Let the child know that it’s ok to ask questions and that you’re happy to answer any and all of their concerns. This open and transparent relationship fosters trust, which is particularly important during difficult times. Trying to conceal information or evading questions will only come back to haunt you later. Any unanswered questions will lead the child to overthink, increasing their anxiety.
#4 Remind them that things will get better
Children tend to live in the moment. When they’re happy, they’re ecstatic, but bad times also feel like they’ll last forever. Remind children that this isn’t the case and that in a few weeks or even a month, life will be radically different. Planning events for the future and giving them something to look forward to can help. Letting a child know that nothing is permeant and even bad times must pass is one of the main responsibilities of a parent, and that’s never more true than during a crisis.
